Monday, May 21, 2007

I'm back, if only for a moment...

So I really haven't had time to talk, just go on other sites and give my opinions on life...not that my life is so perfect...
So much happens in my life and I have so many thoughts that I just can't organize them enough to write them down...and then its hard to get to the computer with the teenagers around...
But as Bearmaiden explained (she expresses herself so much better than me) when I leave one venue, its gone for that time and I don't think about it...each person has their own space and time, so when I'm home I'm mommy, not professor or clinician...get it?...
you have to understand I have very distinct and different people that inhabit my body...maybe its being Gemini...lets start with my name.
I have one name (my first) for work and school and all who meet me during that time...then I have my other name (my middle) that family and family friends call me. I have my mommy hat, my professor hat, my clinician hat, my wild hoe hat...ha ha just kidding... but it gets confusing, to the point when I leave messages I have to ask myself "what name does this person know me as" or when I meet someone I have to remember who I'm with...I once met a nice guy and introduced myself with my middle name, but was with folks who only knew me by my first...so when he asked my girlfriend something about me (she was drunk) she said "I don't know who you are talking about, that's not her name".
so when I sit down to write, it gets hard because I don't know which person I'm pulling up, which is more interesting...you have voices, I have completely different people (real too) who make me who I am.
When I was younger, it was just easy to let folks (big bear and Bearmaiden especially) talk for me...this way I didn't have to figure out who was gonna say what...my fam said I went on a zigzag path through life, but that's not really the case, it just depends who's ON at that time or on that day...
So not to scare anyone, I just stay quiet...so as time goes on you will get a paragraph from each person that resides in my body...

2 comments:

Julie said...

Well, fellow Gemini (my birthday is exactly 1 week from yours), I look forward to hearing from your cast of characters. I can totally relate to having a whole entourage of people living inside you. Somehow, my folks all keep themselves straight and I don't know how. The right ones show themselves to the right people and they only all reveal themselves to the folks they know won't run screaming into the night. Wish I knew how they kept it all straight.

Happy BDay! And write more often!!! I enjoy reading what you have to say. You have a perspective on the world that's worth hearing.

The Bear Maiden said...

Yeah, I distinctly remember Sarah. One day she yelled "I don't WANT to be good! I WANT to be bad". And of course when you were two or three you were a black labrador retriever with a red collar. I still wonder how you knew what a Black Lab was... we lived in Jamaica :). I've known there were at least 3 people in there.... you're telling me there's more???

And happy birthday, dear sis. I'm sorry I didn't get it together to get you even a card. You have to forgive your older/younger sis' narcissistic tendencies. I'm not always thoughtful but I always love you and admire the hell out of you. You saved my mental health, and ultimately brought me back to my self.