yeah so I'm walking away...i can't and won't change folks minds...i know why he does what he does...and yes the physical connection is an issue, more for him than me...but it's all good...he is a step closer to the complete package...but honestly i promise im not doing this shit again...i just can't...and won't...
i knew it was done when i insulted him...it gets to a point where you want to lash out...i don't like that point...cause then i want to explain and apologize...then i dig a deeper hole and start acting out of character...i become whiney and naggy and that's not me...idiot got me to that point...i hated it but i so wanted to explain myself but he didn't care...i find that folks then hold on to that and miss the bigger picture...
so i walk...i loved hard, enjoyed myself, will love my memories, but it's put in a box and up on a shelf...next...

i can't deal with my sisters situation...i just can't...but im there for her so i have to buck up and face it...cause that's what sisters do...sigh...

but overall my life is good and im happy...i will always look on the bright side...i will not let the negative suck me under....there is so much negative in the world i will not contribute to the madness...

it snowed...it was absolutely beautiful...the world was white and silent...makes me long for the country...i really want to see vermont in the winter...i know it's harsh but i want to experience it...

so that's it for the day...i have no great thoughts or reflections...im just living and am glad i woke up this morning...