Hey world...

I'm not keeping my promise about writing every day...I sit and look at this blank square and then say "naw, not tonite"...
a lot has been going on...my beautiful choclahontas enrolled in college and started her first class today...this is huge...she has a full course load...I know she will do well and I know she will finish...I just wish she had some kind of financial independence...I don't know what's going to happen on march 1st when the rent is due cause no one has it...

It's almost time to search for a new name for moodmagicbarbie...she is not as moody as she used to be...this is a good thing...she is really growing up and maturing...she still berates me when we talk, and she still does not accept me for who I am, but that will change in time...I'm a little worried that at 14 she's not social...she'd much prefer to sit in her room with the door tightly shut and locked then go out with friends...but then again, I'm sure when she hits 18, 19, 20, she will be a party whore...or maybe not...I just don't want her to look back on this time and regret not having fun...also being locked in the room with your own thoughts you can develop a distorted sense of self...

I'm worried about Poppy...he is in chronic pain, he's not eating and all he wants to do is sleep...bigbear takes all the brunt cause poppy won't hear of us doing anything...I sat with him one day...asked him repeatedly if he needed juice or food...he said no...the MOMENT bigbear walked in he started telling her he was hungry and wanted juice...

I'm changing wiseman's name to Labrador...I swear he is like a freakin lab puppy that bowls you over with affection the moment you walk in the door...I do like him, he has no ulterior motive, there are no "BUTS" with him...he is proving to be who he says he is, and what he says he is...but LORD...be careful what you ask for cause you might just get it...the affection is OVERWHELMING...I have to tell him "slow down speedy Gonzalez, let me breath"...he's not Russian hands and roaming fingers or anything like that, and I do like the affection but DAMN, I'm not used to this...I can see myself with him for a while and he does make me happy but I'm still at the stage that if he were to bounce, or I saw a side I did not like or tolerate I wouldn't miss him if he left...

so that's my life in a nutshell...