before I start working...

...still don't have a laptop...thanks all for the adapter information...I just can't, at this time, afford one...

I want to throw a few things out there...

1. in response to Bearmaiden...my kids are driving me crazy...you are so right when you say my kids don't fear me...and they really do think I'm all talk...but I have found that with girls you got to sneak attack...let them think they got the upper hand, than BAM, you take that shit away...
living with a high needs child is extremely draining...trying to keep the balance between a child who demands the attention, and one who is passive aggressive is REALLY draining...that on top of trying to feed your family and not max out your credit card cause you might have to pay rent on that bitch is EXTREMELY draining...
I really choose my battles...I just physically don't have the energy to fight everything...but like I tell the girls, life is gonna kick your ass if I don't, so I'm not stressing it...I'm trying to make your life easier, I tell them, but I have a life that doesn't have to involve you...
but I'm tired...however I'm like the turtle, slow and steady wins the race...

2. It was horrible about the murder of Jennifer Hudson's mother and brother...I'm not professing to be psychic and I'm probably wrong, but I have a few nagging feelings that I can't shake so I'm putting it out there...
I believe the sister is strongly involved...I also see her son in a small tight dark place...like under the house, in a bin, freezer, car trunk or something of that nature, I also see a lot of grass and shrubbery around him and I feel he's really close to home...almost under their noses...I believed he ran in fear and felt he was alive, but last night I got the distinct feeling he's dead...I do have a scenario of how this could have happened but I'm not putting that out there...I saw it play out in my mind...now folk, remember, I only know what you know and I'm sure I'm 100% off track, but I told you I would be honest and tell you when something came to me...

3. why the fuck am I broke...I'm going over my budget again and again, and I can't figure out where my moneys going...well I can...I used to be able to feed me and MMB on 65 a week...I realized, as I charged groceries, that I'm spending 100 a week on the same shit...also gas is killing me...but this morning gas was 3.05 a gallon...that should help...

so folk, I'm going to work...going to work with my littlies and their issues that don't pale in comparison to mine...